Warning: This is an extremely boring narration on Anuvrat. It is only me, me and me. So you might want to skip right over it.
The story of my life! I need not look into more than 4 years into my past to compare the boy I was and the guy I have come to be. I remember vaguely declaring to anybody who would care to listen, before going to IIT Kharagpur, that I shall come out as a man unchanged in habit and manners. Times Change, People Change – I know. Yet, there was this belief in me that I shall remain the same person that I had always been at school. I was happy then. I had just realized the then biggest dream of getting into an IIT. What else did I need? No reason to alter myself I thought.
And my first year friends will acknowledge the fact that I remained the same shy, introverted person throughout the first year. Slept at 10. Would keep my room clean. Cared a lot for my possessions. Avoid anything unfamiliar. Rather stay in the background than try to get noticed. This was Anuvrat Singh, JEE404, in the year 2005.
I was fortunate enough to make an amazing group of friends – Ketan, Naresh, Ritej, Akhilesh, Akshit, Rohit, Ved, DC, Srinath, Gyanendra. Each of them unique in a special way. They started influencing me. But did I know back then that they would completely overhaul my personality? No is the simple answer. I still missed my school friends a lot.
Then came the dreaded second year – The Orientation Period, as it is called. I was boarded at the Radha Krishnan Hall of Residence. This was the year I started becoming more confident of myself. I was learning to say No. There was this painting on the walls of my room. The caption said – What are you waiting for, Reveal Yourself. I made new friends this year in Ratno, Siddhartha, Raunaq, Shadab, Nitin and Arpan.
But I remained the honest introvert. In fact, also confused.
The third year came along. A few more people became important to me. Birinder Tiwana and his brother Birjodh. The two were the complete opposites of me. This was the year when all the people would be trying to land a foreign internship. And I did! I remember the date – 7th December (only because it coincides with the birthday of a friend) – when I received the mail. I was selected at EPFL!
And this was the point from which I never looked back again - or so I feel. It all happened so suddenly and magically. Time seems to have sped by swiftly since then. So many eventful days. I think this is when I started changing. I no longer missed my school friends. I completely got over them.
Arpit, Vinu and Varun became friends – we were all headed to EPFL. The 6th semester was spent planning the great vacation at Switzerland. Rohit too was accepted at a university in the same country. We got ourselves schengen visas. We were going to tour Europe!
And the three months at Switzerland was like some surreal dream. It was the first time I went shopping alone. I wasn’t afraid to be myself anymore. I could openly express my opinions. I was way more confident of myself than I had ever been. I was happy – a happy which was different from the happy after clearing the JEE. And I liked it. I wanted more of it. I wanted to be happy. I did not want to be bothered with future anymore. I wanted to live the present. This was the time I actually started dreaming. I wanted to live up my dreams.
Back at Kharagpur for the final year, I could feel my Swiss enthusiasm to have been carried over here as well. I was smiling like all the time. I had become overly energetic. Half the time I was jumping around in my room. I was happier than I had ever been in my lifetime. I was chatting with people more than I ever did – just so that you know, I hate socializing. I was spending a lot of time with my friends. Akshit’s careless attitude I liked, Naresh’s dedication to work I appreciated. We had lots of parties – like almost every other weekend.
I got back in touch with more than a couple of school friends – thanks orkut. I had a facebook account! I was starting to interact with people in public chats. I made a few online friends – people I have never met but have chatted to.
Come January and I had a job. Life couldn’t have been merrier. We bunked classes and went to a trip of Dehradun. We were white river rafting while our classmates were busy solving homework assignments. March and April was literally like the month of parties all around. This was Anuvrat Singh, o5CS1023, graduating in the year 2009.
Those two semesters completely changed the person I was. It’s like a feeling of being rejuvenated. I probably still am an introvert, but I make a sincere effort to interact with people. I try to influence people all around myself with my enthusiasm and excess energy. I don’t like to sit at home anymore. I want to hang out. Any place will do. Bike trips – bring it on. I am game for any adventurous activity you can come up with. It’s like I have discovered someone within me, someone totally different, and he wants to reveal himself.
This is why, of late, I have been feeling more at home with my friends at Bangalore than in Hyderabad. At home my activities are curbed. Also, at Hyderabad, I go back to being the old Anuvrat which I do not want to any more. Its like alter ego taking over me.
When at Bangalore, it is I who decides what to do with my time. I sometimes go to office at midnight. I sometimes go for coffee at 1 am. Sometimes, we are just making noise the whole night, watching movies or playing cards. Security guard calls on us to cut down the volume, but we don’t care. On more than a couple of occasions we have spent over 1K on just dinner! We are quite spontaneous in what we do – never planning ahead, just doing whatever pleases us.
And then I come to Hyderabad, I am with my parents – civilized and mannered. Then I go back to being a prick at Bangalore. Then once again I am at Hyderabad, where there are so few friends – all of them working, none of them has time to meet me during the weekdays. Then I am back at Bangalore, having a jolly good time with my flatmates on a Wednesday evening. Another weekend, I am in Hyderabad and spend my night surfing the net and doing nothing productive. I am now in Bangalore, working late night on a piece of code. I am at Hyderabad, bored and nothing to do. I am at Bangalore, all the friends just 10 minutes away, never alone, never bored and always happy.
I do not know what gets into me when I come back home. It’s like two people entwined into one, controlled by an automatic toggle switch which controls the dominant personality. But I want to get rid of the old me completely. People often stare into infinity and with a smile assert that school days had been the best time of their life. I am at loss at how to explain people that perhaps those years were the most boring ones that I have ever had. I love the friends I made back then, but I detest the person I was in school.
It’s become too long now. I just want to declare now that I have indeed changed a lot. I just know one thing now – I want to make all my dreams come true. No matter how unreasonable they are, I don’t care what I have to do for that, I don’t mind being a rebel, the society does not bother me any more. I am selfish now, and it is this passion of being happier than the happiest person I have ever met which drives me. And as always, I want to remind myself -
What good is money if I have no family and friends to spend the fortune on.
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